Hello again folks.
I want to take a moment and say that I hope I didn’t leave the wrong impression
about how I felt about this particular year. Yes, I did have quite a bit of
bile and anger about quite a few songs that came out in 1976, but ultimately I’m
happy that I chose this year specifically to look through. Why? Because, for
the most part, the music that came out this year was very good. In fact, it was
ridiculously good. Not only was the good music incredibly good, there was also
plenty of it. There were so many good songs that came out this year that I
actually have way more songs to include on the honorable mentions list than I
normally would choose to. I’ll get to those momentarily, but I just want to
take a moment to just show how much I appreciate that a year like this existed,
and that I got the chance to cover it. Considering how few and far between
genuinely good years in pop music tend to be nowadays, it’s nice to look back
at the good stuff that stood out and had a seriously positive impact on our
culture, both at the time and today.
But enough beating
around the bush; I get the feeling that you’d prefer I just cut to the chase
and get to the songs already. Very well then, I shall. First things first: the
rather hefty list of honorable mentions:
You’ll Never Find Another Love Like Mine
(Lou Rawls) [32; 2; 13 weeks]
This was a groovy
little dance number delivered courtesy of American gospel, R&B, soul, jazz
and blues performer Lou Rawls. This was his biggest and most successful single,
but that’s not to say he’s not still a talented performer. Frank Sinatra once
stated that he had “the classiest singing and silkiest chops in the singing
game,” and I can definitely see why he would make that claim. That said, I felt
like I had a bit of trouble buying into this song. Just something about the
cockiness and overconfidence the singer conveys just turns me off to it a
little. Still, with Rawls’s deep, soulful vocals, I would definitely say it’s
still quite a lovely song to groove to with your lover.
Blinded By The Light (Manfred Mann’s Earth
Band) [--; 32; 3 weeks]
This song was a
much bigger hit in the following year, but it technically first charted in the
top 40 in ’76, so I’m barely counting it as an honorable mention. This has to
be one of the strangest songs I’ve heard; the lyrics are basically nonsensical.
This song was originally written and performed by Bruce Springsteen, who put it
together by basically just picking out random words from a rhyming dictionary
and sticking them together. No, seriously; that’s how this song was made. And
when Manfred Mann’s Earth Band covered it, they ended up changing some of the
lyrics, so it became even more nonsensical. And yet, despite how little sense
the song actually makes, I can’t help but enjoy it. Just the bombast and
enthusiasm behind the song won be over before I could even think of just how
little sense the song actually made.
Over My Head (Fleetwood Mac) [--; 20; 5
weeks]
I honestly wish
that country music would start moving back in this direction, less stuff about
cars, beer and hoes and more about personal emotions and with a bit of a more
theatrical feel to them.
Hurricane (Bob Dylan) [--; 33; 3 weeks]
Okay, yes, I think
Bob Dylan’s voice sounds like sandpaper at points. That said, I feel it
actually works for a song like this one. This isn’t trying to be a pretty pop
song; it’s a song about a real event that had serious, real consequences on
people and includes uncomfortable subject matters. Songs like this don’t really
crop up nowadays on mainstream radio anymore, well besides Macklemore’s ‘Same
Love,’ but that’s addressing a completely different subject matter.
Slow Ride (Foghat) [85; 20; 12 weeks]
Now here’s an
awesome rock song. I especially like that, despite its theme of relaxing and
taking your time, the song still has energy and a driving force behind it.
More Than A Feeling (Boston) [--; 5; 12
weeks]
Speaking of rock
music classics, here’s yet another. I like how the song’s verses are soft and
contemplative; they serve as nice contrasts to the much louder, more bombastic
chorus.
Who’d She Coo? (Ohio Players) [86; 18; 10
weeks]
This was a really
good year for funk, disco and dance music. So, brace yourselves, folks; there’s
a lot more where this came from.
Happy Days (Pratt & McClain) [--; 5; 10
weeks]
Yes, I’m aware
that this song was technically first recorded in 1974, and again in 1975.
However, the version that became a hit was the single off of Pratt and
McClain’s ‘Pratt & McClain Featuring Happy Days’ album. And honestly folks,
I think this song still holds up today. Yes, the show didn’t ultimately survive
with the same level of quality after it jumped the shark, but the theme song is
still a classic.
That’s the Way (I Like It) (KC and the
Sunshine Band) [45; 3; 5 weeks]
Now this is how disco music should be made:
tight, groovy and energetic, and most importantly, no stupid duck noises!
I’d Really Love To See You Tonight (England
Dan & John Ford Coley) [21; 2; 17 weeks]
I think this is a
rather sweet song. It sounds like it’s about someone trying to meet up with
another person after a long time has passed. It also seems to imply that there
were romantic feelings between the two of them at one point, or that they might
still be there, but that the narrator is trying not to let those feelings sway
him. It’s not exactly something deep or meaningful, but still a nice, little,
sentimental song.
Love Rollercoaster (Ohio Players) [30; 1; 9
weeks]
And here’s yet
another song by the Ohio Players, and yet another sweet song to dance to. They
seem to have a strong knack for creating songs out of a single repeated phrase
and having them turn out really good. Maybe the Silver Convention could’ve
afforded to take a few more pages from their songwriting book.
Theme From S.W.A.T. (Rhythm Heritage) [29;
1; 12 weeks]
I think this will
be my first time talking about a purely instrumental theme. Though, considering
most of the dance songs I’ve looked at so far haven’t really had the lyrics
actually meaning anything, I guess it makes sense that I’d eventually get to a
dance song that did away with lyrics altogether. To be fair though, it’s not
like the song really needs them.
Disco Lady (Johnnie Taylor) [3; 1; 13 weeks]
For how harsh I
was with the dance songs that appeared on the worst list, I’m certainly seeing
quite a few songs that made up for them on this list. This is probably one of
the more laid back dance songs that came out this year, primarily because of
the production, which I think is the real star of this song.
Getaway (Earth, Wind & Fire) [80; 12; 12
weeks]
Now here’s a dance
song I can get behind: a song that not only invites the listener to dance, but
offers escape, sanctuary from the oppressive outside world through dance. And
of course, it’s only fitting that such a song would come from Earth, Wind &
Fire.
Fopp (Ohio Players) [--; 30; 5 weeks]
I honestly think I
might become a fan of the Ohio Players at this rate. Maybe I should check out
more of their music. This song in particular is a nice contrast from their
other songs, having a much more aggressive feel to it that makes it a lot more
memorable.
You’re My Best Friend (Queen) [83; 16; 11
weeks]
This is a pretty
interesting song coming from Queen. It’s certainly one of the more subdued
songs of theirs that I’ve heard. I mean, yes, they were able to release things
like ‘Crazy Little Thing Called Love,’ and ‘Who Wants to Live Forever,’ but I’m
not sure if those songs managed to still capture the essence of Queen in the
same way that this song did. Their trademark ‘wall of sound’ effect that they
create with their harmonies is still present, as are Freddie’s unmistakable
vocals.
Doctor Tarr & Professor Fether (The Alan
Parsons Project) [--; 37; 2 weeks]
You most likely
have no idea what this song is. And if such is the case, I humbly suggest you
rectify this. It’s a song that intentionally tries to come across as unsettling
and atmospheric, and I think it pulls it off. I mean, just listen to that
guitar line, and the organ! Sadly, it lyrically feels kind of lacking, with
words mostly thrown together to create rhymes, though to be fair the words used
do still flow into each other well.
Turn the Beat Around (Vicki Sue Robinson)
[38; 10; 13 weeks]
Okay, I’ll admit,
there were a lot of disco dance songs that came out this year that I liked.
There are still more of them to be listed here; I’m not finished yet. I guess
I’m just a real sucker for disco music.
Car Wash (Rose Royce) [--; 9; 4 weeks]
Quick question: is
this song supposed to be glorifying working at the car wash or making it sound
like horrible, grueling work? I’m just a bit confused about what the song’s
giving me. Of course, this is yet another dance song, so it really doesn’t
matter either way. The goal of the song has nothing to do with cars; it exists
for one purpose and one purpose only: to make you dance. And in that regard it
definitely succeeds.
I Only Wanna Be With You (Bay City Rollers)
[--; 12; 12 weeks]
I honestly think
this is a really nice song; it’s just a cute little affirmation of one’s
feelings for another. Also, unlike the Stampeders’ disastrous cover of ‘Hit the
Road Jack,’ the Bay City Rollers’ version actually has them sound like they’re
able to perform this song and perform it well. This is how you cover a song!
Nights On Broadway (The Bee Gees) [--; 13; 3
weeks]
This technically
was a bigger hit in 1975 and only barely bled over into being a hit in ’76, but
it’s still a really good song and definitely would’ve qualified for the list
otherwise.
You Should Be Dancing (The Bee Gees) [31; 1;
12 weeks]
As long as we’re
talking about the Bee Gees, might as well bring this one up also. This is a
good example of music that doesn’t casually request its listener to dance like
‘Get Up and Boogie’ tried and failed to do, but rather commands its listener to
dance.
I Love Music (The O’Jays) [52; 5; 8 weeks]
I told you I
wasn’t finished listing disco songs. I guess the main things about this
particular one that make it stand out are the bongos. They just add a unique
kind of energy to the beat. Besides that though, it’s a nice little declaration
of love and appreciation for music, especially that which has a nice groove to
it, that is also nice to dance to.
Boogie Fever (The Sylvers) [20; 1; 15 weeks]
Not really a lot
to be said about this one. I’ll at least say it made better use of the word
‘boogie’ than the Silver Convention did.
Action (Sweet) [--; 20; 7 weeks]
This is what I
tend to lean more towards in terms of rock music: music that has lots of energy
and bombast. Not the only song by Sweet that I liked this year either, but I’ll
get to that when we get into the list proper.
I Wish (Stevie Wonder) [--; 7; 5 weeks]
…Okay, this is the
last honorable mention I’m listing here, I swear.
Now then, get
ready to shake shake shake your booties, ladies and gentlemen, ‘cause we are
counting down…
…THE TOP 10 BEST HIT SONGS OF 1976!
#10.
It really does not
say good things about me when I have to begin my best list right off the bat
with an apology. I’m not apologizing for the song I’m listing here for the
record; it’s a beautiful song and I like it a lot. No, I’m apologizing for my
rather harsh criticisms of Whitney Houston back when I put ‘All the Man That I
Need’ on my worst of ’91 list. I stated that I wasn’t really a fan because her
music tended to be too overblown for me, and I wasn’t that big of a fan of slow
tempo ballads, especially ones that had the performer collaborating with the
likes of Kenny G of all people. That said, I was still being rather
disrespectful to an artist who had made serious contributions to the music
world, who went through a lot of serious problems through her life including
drug abuse and being abused by her husband, and who had died three years prior.
So, me talking badly about Whitney Houston back on that list, I just want to
offer my sincerest apologies for that. After all, while I’m not and haven’t
ever been a fan, I will acknowledge that Whitney Houston was a very good
performer. She had a lot of talent and was able to perform very powerful songs.
And she was capable of exercising decent range in her music, performing
slow-tempo love songs and even energetic dance music like ‘How Will I Know’ and
‘I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me).’ And she was responsible for
breaking down barriers for a lot of black female performing artists that would
follow her, such as Janet Jackson and Anita Baker.
However, as far as
famous black female performing artists go, before we had Whitney Houston, there
was Diana Ross.
#10. Theme From Mahogany (Do You Know Where
You’re Going To) (Diana Ross) [43; 1; 8 weeks]
Back when she was
a part of the all female group the Supremes, which was one of Motown’s most
successful acts of the 1960s, Diana Ross’s fame rivaled that of the Beatles in
terms of worldwide popularity, and with her success future African American
R&B and soul groups were also able to find mainstream success. Over the
course of both her time with the Supremes and her solo career, Ross has earned
a grand total of 18 number one hit songs, and influenced numerous artists,
including Janet Jackson, Michael Jackson, Mariah Carey, Christina Aguilera,
Lil’ Kim, Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Fergie, Jennifer Lopez, Mary J Blige and
Leona Lewis, and African American women groups, such as the Emotions, TLC and
Destiny’s Child. She’s also credited as having discovered the Jackson 5.
As for this song
in particular, this is the theme to Ross’s second film, Mahogany, a film that casts her as an aspiring fashion designer who
becomes a runway model and a star of the fashion industry. Sadly, while it was
a success at the box office, this film was a disaster, both in terms of
critical reception and behind the scenes, with the film’s director being fired
during production, leaving Motown founder Berry Gordy to direct the film
himself. However, Ross clashed with Gordy during filming, eventually resulting in
Ross leaving the production before they’d finished filming it. And having now
watched the finished product…yeah, it was kind of a mess of a movie. With all
the tension going on between people during production, I can’t imagine how this
film could have been salvaged. However, if anything good came from the
existence of this movie it was this song.
The song presents
questions of uncertainty regarding the pursuit of one’s life goals, and
reflects on the narrator’s own insecurity regarding their life choices. One
such question is actually rather interesting: “Why must we wait so long before
we’ll see how sad the answers to those questions can be?” That’s actually a
good question to ask. Why do we have to wait before we find the answers to the
questions we’re asked about our life goals and dreams of the pursuit of
happiness, especially when it turns out that the things we’re pursuing might
not necessarily be the things that will ensure we achieve that happiness we
seek? And the music matches that tone very well, with its soft, contemplative
feel, though matching it with possibly a subtle hint of optimism. But really,
what makes this song work is Diana Ross herself, who, being perfectly honest,
has a beautiful voice and just really sells the insecurity and lack of clarity
behind the song.
When I think of a
song that captures the idea of light at the end of a tunnel, this song is what
comes to mind. I’m not normally one for soft, slow-tempo ballads, but I have to
give it up for this one. In a year that was dominated by disco and funk music
it was a breath of fresh air.
#9.
Couldn’t have put
it better myself, Mr. Walken.
#9. (Don’t Fear) The Reaper (Blue Öyster
Cult) [--; 12; 14 weeks]
Yeah, I bet plenty
of you reading this didn’t even know this was a hit. I first heard about this
song through my older sister from when she played it on Rock Band. I didn’t
think much of it at the time, but since I was exposed to it, I think it’s grown
on me.
The first things
I’d like to talk about are the lyrics and theme of the song. The lyrics focus
on the inevitability of death, and how foolish it is to live in fear of it.
This doesn’t mean that the Blue Öyster Cult were trying to glorify death or
advertise suicide when they wrote the song, but rather just encourage people
not to be afraid of death as opposed to actively seeking it. Much like how,
‘the seasons don’t fear the reaper, nor do the wind, the sun or the rain,’
people need not spend their lives haunted by the fear of death, but choose to
accept it, live their lives to the fullest and, once their time comes, face
their death with quiet, dignity and grace. The song also focuses on the theme
of eternal love, with such lines as ‘Romeo and Juliet are together in eternity’
reflecting the idea of lovers transcending physical boundaries and being united
in death, with their love never fading.
Okay, the themes
are one thing, but what about the music? Well, as I said before, I didn’t
really buy into it at first; I felt like it was a bit too soft, but it’s grown
on me. I think the main selling point for me is the guitar riff, which is built
on the ‘i-VII-VI’ chord progression. Said riff was recorded with a Gibson
ES-175 guitar run through a Music Man 410 combo amplifier, giving it a very
distinct, classic rock sound. Also, as Christopher Walken was kind enough to
bring up, the song features prominent use of the cowbell, though interestingly
enough was originally recorded without it, but had it overdubbed into the song
later. And I’m glad that they ultimately decided to do so because that sound
helps bring the song together. Normally I’m bothered by tiny little percussive
sound effects that resemble woodblocks or water, but this one I’m willing to
tolerate because it’s far enough at the back of the track that it’s not
actively overpowering any other parts of the song.
And lastly, there
are the vocals. The softer, more relaxed feel that lead singer Donald ‘Buck
Dharma’ Roeser brings to the song matches the song’s subject matter, that being
to accept and not be afraid of the inevitability of death. In fact, music
critic Nathan Buckett compared the vocals on the song to those of the Beach
Boys. I’m not necessarily sure I’d go that far, but I can say this: I’d
definitely take the Blue Öyster Cult trying to be the Beach Boys over the Beach
Boys’ own contribution to 1976, an underperformed cover of Chuck Berry’s ‘Rock
and Roll Music’.
Bottom line, this
song is both an awesome song and a good message. Don’t live in fear of death,
since it’s not a possibility but a certainty. Though that doesn’t mean you
should go actively seeking it out; just accept it and keep living your life.
#8.
If you’ve been
paying attention to either of these lists so far, it should be abundantly clear
that there was a fuck ton of funk music in 1976; a funk ton, if you will. On the one hand, the abundance of funk music
is greatly welcomed because, well, funk and disco music are awesome and it’s a
shame that we still wound up getting outright stupid pieces of crap like ‘Disco
Duck’ to give such music a bad name. On the other hand, with so much of this
music being accumulated all in one year, some of it tends to blend into each
other. So if one were in a situation where one would need to listen to a lot of
different songs from these genres consecutively, like I did when putting these
lists together, all of the songs end up sounding uncomfortably similar. I
sincerely hope I’m not coming across as saying ‘all black music sounds the
same,’ because that’s not true at all. I love all of the funk songs listed
above; I just tend to struggle with identifying what elements from one such song
I like in place of the elements from a different song. I feel like this is less
of a problem with the music and more of a problem with myself for not being
able to properly distinguish the things I like from one song from the things I
like from a different song. The bottom line is I really had a lot of trouble
trying to pick just one song to represent the genre as a whole for this list.
So please understand that I did not make this choice lightly.
#8. Give Up the Funk (Tear the Roof Off the
Sucker) (Parliament) [93; 15; 10 weeks]
This is probably
going to be the hardest song for me to talk about on this list. Again, this has
nothing to do with the song itself, but more to do with my inability to specify
what exact elements are present on this song that distinguish it from all the
other funk songs to come out this year. In fact, it’s also kind of hard for me
to talk about why it’s this song in particular that I like, since it
demonstrates many qualities that are also present on songs that were dishonorable
mentions on the worst list. For example, it’s incredibly repetitive, basically
repeating two different segments together over and over, with occasional breaks
with repeated musical segments. So, what stops me from dismissing this song as
being no better than the other mindless, overly repetitious dance songs that
this year spawned?
Well, there are a
couple of things that work in this song’s favor. For starters, while every
segment of the song is repeated at least once throughout the song, the
structure of the song is such that I don’t hear any segment enough times
consecutively for it to wear out on me. Each line is only repeated four times
at most. It’s just varied enough that I can enjoy each segment without them
wearing out on me. In addition, some segments have slight variations to them in
terms of the vocals or the instrumentation, so each repeated segment does
slightly change and evolve over the course of the song. For example, one
segment, when first repeated, has a much more prominent bass voice over the
rest of the track.
I guess another
thing about this song that makes it stand out a bit more is the interplay
between the instruments. The
primary instrumental parts are the bass and drums, with the brass and
synthesizers basically working in tandem with those. Another thing I should
note is that the album cut of the song begins with a bass vocal part repeating
the lines, ‘Tear the roof off/We gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker/Tear
the roof off the sucker.” This is absent from the single version, which I
honestly think is a shame because that bass vocal part really helps to start
off the song’s momentum.
If there’s
anything more impressive than the song, it’s probably the story behind
Parliament themselves. They were originally a ‘50s doo-wop group called ‘The
Parliaments’ led by George Clinton, consisting of ten members; five vocalists
and five instrumentalists. However, due to a contractual dispute, Clinton lost
the rights to the name ‘The Parliaments’ and instead signed the instrumentalists
as ‘Funkadelic,’ with the vocalists featured as uncredited guests. The singers
would eventually be relaunched as the singing group ‘Parliament,’ meaning
Clinton then owned two different acts consisting of the same members, but with
each marketed as creating two different styles of funk. While continuing
contractual problems and the fact that Funkadelic’s music was more successful
at the time lead to Clinton abandoning the name ‘Parliament,’ the addition of
new members to the group lead to him relaunching Parliament in 1974, this time
selling them as a smoother R&B-based funk ensemble to serve as counterpoint
to the guitar-based funk rock of Funkadelic. Unfortunately, with the increase
in members to the Parliament-Funkadelic group over the course of the ‘70s, and
several key members of the group leaving due to issues they took with Clinton’s
management style, things weren’t looking great for the groups by the late ‘70s.
And the early ‘80s didn't see them fairing much better, since Clinton was
facing legal issues due to the multiple names of different groups associated
with him, as well as issues with Casablanca Records, the record company they
were working under. Under all this pressure, Clinton ultimately dissolved both
Parliament and Funkadelic as recording and touring groups. However, many of the
musicians within the two groups at this point in time were still employed by
Clinton, who continued releasing albums, both under his name and the name
‘George Clinton & the P-Funk All-Stars,’ and they continued touring at
least into the ‘90s and 2000s.
While Parilament
managed to score a second hit with ‘Flash Light’ in 1978, none of the other
groups associated with George Clinton managed to gain as much success as
Parliament achieved with ‘Give Up the Funk,’ sadly. However, I get the
impression Clinton’s still doing fairly well for himself, since he’s still
contributing to other people’s songs to this day. Regardless, this song
continues to endure the test of time as the classic funk jam that it is. Gotta
have that funk!
#7.
When an artist
reinvents themself, it can generally go one of two ways: either the artist
gains newfound popularity through a creative stylistic shift and reaches the
height of their success, or the start of what would be a rise in their success
in some cases, or the artist gets dismissed as a total sellout and alienates
themself from both their fan base and potential new listeners alike. So, from
my understanding artists usually only go this route for one of two reasons,
either out of a curiosity to experiment with new styles and see what comes of
it, or their managers need them to make a new, more successful piece that has
little regard to artistic integrity. At the same time, however, maintaining a
consistent image isn’t exactly a smart move either because if the artist
doesn’t grow or evolve, then their audience will eventually leave them behind
and find something else to listen to. So, what if an artist’s entire appeal is
built around them changing and altering their image? Well then you get probably
some of the more interesting artists that we’ve seen in music, such as Madonna,
Lady Gaga and, of course, David Bowie.
#7. Golden Years (David Bowie) [33; 10; 16
weeks]
I was first
introduced to David Bowie when I was just a wee lad, around my early elementary
school years and I was shown the film ‘Labyrinth.’ Oh, the Jim Henson muppet
work was definitely what caught most of my attention, but I’d be lying if I
were to say I didn’t end up hearing Bowie’s songs from that film playing in my
head years down the line. I don’t know if anyone realizes this, but it took
David Bowie about a decade, since the start of his solo career in 1964, to
actually see any chart success. And even after that he didn’t score any hits in
the top 40 until three years later. His ‘Young Americans’ album was when he
finally managed to capture the attention of people in, well, America, but it
was ‘Fame,’ his first number one single, that established him as a star. He did
manage to score another hit when he rereleased ‘Space Oddity’ that year, but it
was ‘Golden Years’ that served as the true follow up that proved that, yes,
Bowie was not just some flash-in-the-pan that was going to disappear anytime
soon. How does it fair?
Well, let’s look
at the lyrics. Now, from my understanding, the ‘golden years’ are actually the
point in one’s life where one has reached the point of retirement, usually
referring to those at least 65 years and older. I didn’t quite understand what
the song was about at first, but then I found out that he originally wrote the
song for Elvis Presley, who wound up turning it down. That gives the song a bit
more clarity, for me anyway, since this was around the last few years of Elvis
Presley’s life, so at this point these were his ‘golden years’ I guess you could
say. The rest of the song talks about how, despite life hitting some low
points, it doesn’t do any good to act like life’s going nowhere; don’t look
back at how you could’ve lived your life, but make the most out of what life
you have left. And this holds especially true for the golden years of one’s
life, since at that point you’ve lived out your entire life up to that point.
If the song’s directed at Elvis, this makes sense since it would basically be
telling him, “Don’t dwell on the ‘what-ifs’ or the ‘if-onlys’ of the past;
you’ve got a very impressive legacy behind you. Take pride in that and live the
rest of your life to the fullest!” Of course, Elvis ended up dying two years
after this song was released, so there you have it.
However,
considering Elvis never accepted the song, and again, the fact that he wound up
dying two years later, that context doesn’t really work. So, without that, what
does the song have left? Well, for starters, a smooth guitar line. That is the
driving force behind the entire song, and it does so beautifully. The
percussion in this song is rather eclectic at points, but that works to the
song’s favor also; it helps make it distinct. In fact, the song progression is
just great in general. It constantly builds on itself as it goes through each
verse and interchanges between its two choruses. Yes, this song has two
choruses. It flips between them with each verse, and both of them serve to
bring the song to different high points.
Of course, there’s
still one element that I think is responsible for bringing all of these other elements
together: the fact that he’s David fucking Bowie! The man is a talented
musician and singer, and he definitely shows his chops here. I seriously think
people are over thinking this song. It’s not meant to be directed at anyone in
particular; it’s not trying to present a message to anyone. It exists for David
Bowie to show off how awesome he is. Also, while Bowie originally wrote this
song for Elvis, I feel like it probably wouldn’t have really worked in his
hands, not at this stage in his career anyway. Seriously, given the choice
between this version of the song and Elvis’s deterioration in health and
musical quality, I’ll take Bowie any day of the week.
David Bowie: more
awesome than you. Deal with it.
#6.
Okay, last one for
this list, I swear.
#6. Play That Funky Music (Wild Cherry) [5;
1; 17 weeks]
This is kind of an
oddball choice for me to be including on this list. The reason I say that is
mostly because I feel like, considering its background, I feel like I should
hate this song. I mean, it’s a song that front man Rob Parissi wrote in five
minutes on a drink order pad that’s basically a song all about the band’s story
and told in a way that it glorifies selling out. Even if I can’t bring myself
to hate on the song, it’s certainly not a song I can fully respect because of
what it represents. In fact, I kind of feel dirty for including this song on
the list at all. This shouldn’t deserve to be considered one of the best hit
songs of the year.
However, at the
same time, I need to remember that this is meant to be an honest list. And in
all honesty, despite the fact that I can’t respect the song, I can’t really
find it in me to hate on it either. As much as I hate what the song represents,
I can’t deny the quality of the separate parts. The bass line, Parissi’s
vocals, the horn section, I love all of these elements. They just tie together
neatly and give the song a fun, groovy feel that is a perfect blend of rock
music and funk music. I will admit, Wild Cherry weren’t unique or
groundbreaking in their decision to blend funk and rock music, but they were
probably the ones that created the best song at this particular point in time
that did so. This didn’t just combine the two genres; it was a unique creation
that belonged completely to Wild Cherry and no one else.
Also, for as harsh
as I just was about the theme that the song represented, it does still have
some positive themes behind it that I can totally get behind. Yeah, it’s just
studio hacks cashing in on a trend. Yeah, it’s a statement by the band about
how great it is to sell out. However, at the same time, it also represents
uniting two different musical forms. In fact, it’s also a representation of,
not just uniting musical forms, but uniting people of different skin color, a
showcase that even white people can enjoy and perhaps even come to understand
black music. Even if you didn’t originally like a certain genre of music, that
didn’t mean that you couldn’t still come to understand or possibly even like it.
Of course, we
still have to thank Vanilla Ice for completely tarnishing this song with his
abysmal version fifteen years later. However, I’ve already gone on about that particular catastrophe, so let’s
just move along, shall we?
#5.
1976 marked a very
significant period for English composer and singer Elton John, who saw his peak
in commercial success and critical acclaim between 1970 and 1976. Between ’72
and ’75, seven of his albums consecutively peaked the Billboard 200 albums charts,
he was forced to fire long time friends and fellow musicians Nigel Olsson and
Dean Murray, who had worked with him since his debut album, he collaborated
with the likes of John Lennon of the Beatles and played a character in the
Who’s rock opera ‘Tommy,’ and additionally, during an interview with Rolling
Stone, John revealed that he was bisexual. That by itself represents a pretty
hefty amount of stuff to happen to a guy within such a short period of time.
How best to bring a period of such significance to a close?
#5. Don’t Go Breaking My Heart (Elton John
& Kiki Dee) [2; 1; 15 weeks]
…No complaints
here.
Being perfectly
honest, I like Elton John as a performer. Let me make it clear, personality
wise he comes across as kind of a dork, but he’s a charming dork. Yeah, a lot
of the time he wrote plenty of slow tempo ballads, which to be fair are not all
bad, but he’s also written plenty of fun, upbeat songs like ‘Benny and the
Jets,’ ‘Crocodile Rock’ and ‘Honky Cat’. When I think of Elton John as a performer,
I don’t think of him as a singer-songwriter ballad performer; I see the guy in
the music video for this song, the guy with the grandma glasses and the cheesy
suit and yet who manages to make the look work. If you want an example of
actual good ‘70s cheese, Elton John is a good place to start, provided you
steer clear of his attempts at reggae.
But I’m not here
to talk about where Elton John goes wrong. No, I’m here to talk about his big
hit from 1976, ‘Don’t Go Breaking My Heart,’ a duet he performs with fellow
English singer Kiki Dee, and a prime example of where Elton John goes right. I
may have down talked the kitschier side of ‘70s music on my worst list, but
this song is a case where the song’s cheesiness is actually one of its
strengths. There’s just a sense of earnestness in how the two of them play off
each other; they have good microphone chemistry. In contrast to Donnie and
Marie Osmond’s wretched duet from this year, whose atrocious butchering of a
‘20s and ‘30s classic made me want to vomit whenever I heard it, this song has
a certain charm to it that excuses the fact that the two performers come across
as kind of dorky. There’s just something adorable about Elton John and Kiki
Dee’s interplay that gives them that charm, and I don’t think that’s something
that Donnie, or any of the Osmonds for that matter, could ever hope to achieve.
Okay, so maybe
I’ve got a bigger stomach for ‘70s cheese than I thought. However, this wasn’t
the only song of this type to end up on this list. Speaking of which…
#4.
As it happens,
Elton John wasn’t the only one to experience an end to a peak of success in
1976. Although, at the very least Elton John was able to keep himself buoyant
on the charts at points after this year, even if he never reached the same
height in success that he achieved during the early to mid ‘70s. The same,
however, can most definitely not be said of this next act, which would pretty
much disappear by 1977. That said, I’d say it’s a good thing that they went out
on a grace note like this one; it’s rare that a musical act gets to end on a
positive note like this.
#4. December 1963 (Oh, What a Night) (The
Four Seasons) [4; 1; 16 weeks]
The Four Seasons
are honestly kind of a frustrating act for me, particularly front man Frankie
Valli. I know they’re a staple of classic American rock music, but there have
been people that were turned off by Valli’s falsetto voice, and sadly I’m one
of those people. Whenever he tries to sing in his upper register, it’s like
he’s pretending to mock his teacher telling him to sit down and do his homework
or something. And I say this as someone that will admit that he probably has a
greater tolerance for falsetto singing than most people, hell as someone who
occasionally has to rely on falsetto to hit some notes that are outside my
normal vocal range. And yet, I wince in pain whenever I hear the
nails-on-a-chalkboard sound of Frankie Valli’s pipes. Fortunately, ‘December
1963’ resolves this problem in two very significant ways. Firstly, Frankie
Valli restricts himself to his regular singing range. His voice admittedly does
still kind of sound like a machine generated it on this song, but to be fair,
better is better. Secondly, Valli is barely featured on this song at all. He
does still feature between the verses, singing one of the bridges, but besides
that the rest of the band does most of the vocals on the song, and it is a
welcome change, not to knock Frankie Valli’s singing or anything.
Regardless, with
just these two details of the song toned down, the rest of the group’s positive
elements are able to shine more prominently. If there’s one thing the group is
really good at it’s writing upbeat, catchy melodies, and this song probably has
them writing what’s easily their catchiest of all. The simple piano riff helps
carry the melody while the bass line and percussion help to offer support, and
it all comes together really nicely. And of course, it’s all topped off with
lead vocals from drummer Gerry Polci, and additional vocals from bassist Don
Ciccone, whose falsetto voices, while not necessarily being as powerful as
Valli’s, are definitely a lot more pleasant to listen to. Much like ‘Don’t Go
Breaking My Heart’ though, I can’t help but feel like there’s something of a
cheesy element to the song. However, also like ‘Don’t Go Breaking My Heart,’ it
works in the song’s favor, giving it a feeling of cheer and merriment.
Of course, this
still leaves the subject matter and lyrical content. I’ll just cut to the chase
here: it’s a song about sex. Specifically, it’s a song describing a
particularly specific experience the narrator had with a woman that he sees as
a pinnacle of beauty and grace. He didn’t just get it on with her; he felt like
the experience changed him, possibly indicating that this was the narrator’s
first experience with sex. However, rather than have it be clumsy or awkward,
the experience was mystifying, mesmerizing, an experience that brought him some
form of what he seems to describe as enlightenment. Granted, once you get down
to it, it’s basically just another sex song tiptoeing around actually straight
up mentioning the word sex. However, it’s the energy of the song and the
earnestness of the lyrics and tone that put it leagues above ‘Afternoon
Delight;’ where that song was dull, boring and edgeless, ‘December 1963’ is
joyous and uplifting, which in a way is the kind of experience one would want
to get out of sexual intercourse, presumably.
Frankie Valli
himself managed to score one last number one hit song with the title track to
the musical Grease in 1978, and never
achieved any further success after that save for a remix of ‘December 1963’
released in 1994. And since then he and the Four Seasons have yet to release
any new material. However, again, I feel like if they had to go out on any kind
of note, I’m glad that it was this one. It’s a very special song for me, as I
remember what a night.
#3.
Now, I think that
I’ve made it clear at this point that I’m not an expert on every genre of music
out there, hell probably not even an expert on any genre of music. I don’t have
a full grasp on things like rap music or country music or R&B. However, if
there were one genre that I can comfortably say I have some level of
familiarity with it would have to be rock music. I was raised on groups like Elvis,
the Beatles, The Who and Simon and Garfunkel, and I even listened to a number
of rock groups in middle and high school. So, suffice to say I’m no stranger to
rock music. So, naturally, I guess it’s no surprise that I’d be drawn to the
‘70s since that was considered the golden age of rock and roll. And indeed, the
top three songs on this list are all rock songs. I realize that kind of
indicates something of a bias on my part. But I will say that these songs
wouldn’t be on this list if I didn’t think they deserved the praise I’m about
to heap on them shortly. So, time to wrap this list up with the top three,
starting with…
#3. Fox on the Run (Sweet) [76; 5; 6 weeks]
To anyone that
makes a FNAF reference for the ‘Foxy on the run’ line, you are not clever!
Sweet originated
in the UK, and were originally a group that mixed bubblegum pop with hard rock,
with their main influences stemming from groups such as the Monkees, the
Archies and The Who. Around this time, however, they’d pretty much gotten fed
up with their management and decided to try to go straight up hard rock, with
this song being the first single the group wrote and produced by themselves, as
opposed to studio executives. And, honestly, I’m glad that they were able to
gain some level of control over their careers. There’s just something
satisfying about an artist getting more creative and artistic control over
their material, at least if said artist is actually good. And yeah folks, Sweet
honestly were a good group.
As I said, most of
Sweet’s music was influenced by ‘60s sugary bubblegum pop, with some doses of
hard rock thrown in, and the mix really does work wonders for them. The hard
rock gives their music driving force and edge while the pop influences help to
make it catchy and upbeat. If you want a good example of this, try going back
and listening to one of their biggest songs: ‘The Ballroom Blitz.’ That song is
rowdy and bombastic and over the top, but there’s still some sense of control
over the sound, and that all works to the song’s advantage.
I have to say
though; I think ‘Fox On the Run’ may top even that. All the elements from ‘The
Ballroom Blitz’ are present, but here they all seem to be turned up to eleven.
It just feels like the band was given the opportunity to let loose more on this
song, yet despite this it’s somehow even catchier! The addition of synthesizers
helps with pushing the song even more over the top; it’ll probably be a
breaking point for some people and launch it into serious cheese territory, but
I quite liked it. And of course, they’ve added in the fantastic ‘wall of sound’
effect that most have come to associate with the likes of Queen, and they
utilize it fantastically! This doesn’t just feel like a song being performed by
one person backed by a band; it feels like everyone in the band has an equal
share of contribution to the song.
Songs like this
are the reason I really enjoy putting these lists together. Just hearing this song
gets me feeling pumped up and ready for the day. It is glorious, and that’s all
there really is to say on the matter.
#2.
You know,
considering how much black music saw a lot of success this year, I feel like
it’s a shame that there aren’t more black artists on this list. Let’s change
that!
#2. The Boys Are Back In Town (Thin Lizzy) [87;
12; 8 weeks]
Thin Lizzy are yet
another European act, though unlike Sweet they originated in Ireland. This also
made lead singer and bassist Phil Lynott the first black Irishman to achieve
commercial success in rock music. They didn’t really see much success prior to
1976, with only their cover of the Irish folk song ‘Whiskey in the Jar’ seeing
any success, peaking at number one in Ireland and charting in the UK and
various other countries in Europe. However, with the release of their sixth
studio album ‘Jailbreak,’ they were not only able to achieve their second
number one single in Ireland, but also a top 20 hit in America. And listening
to it, it’s not hard to see why.
The guitars are
the main driving force of this song, but they do a brilliant job at it. Thin
Lizzy at this point in their tenure utilized two lead guitarists, much like
Judas Priest, the ones here performed by guitarists Scott Gorham and Brian
Robertson, and they really add to the song. I especially love the segment that
always plays after the chorus; it just really helps hit home the sense of
optimism that the song’s trying to shoot for. The song is much more uplifting
and happy than most of Thin Lizzy’s other singles up to this point, which
tended to lean more towards folk and blues music. It’s a welcome departure from
their usual musical sound.
As for the lyrics
and subject matter, the song speaks of, presumably, the return of close
friends, a grand celebration to welcome them back home. As grand as that kind
of merriment could come across coming from anyone, Lynott really sells the
sentiment in his delivery. His soulful, passionate performance is able to match
the bombast and exuberance the guitarists built up. And, of course, that brings
us to the chorus itself. I don’t usually like it when a song’s chorus is built
around a single line repeated over and over, but every outcry of ‘The boys are
back in town!’ just builds on top of the ones before, really helping to push
the song over the top. Besides, it’s not like the chorus needed much else to
add to it. I mean, what more is there to say? The boys are back in town! That
alone sounds like reason to get excited!
I just really
enjoy listening to this song; just hearing it puts me in a good mood. And yet,
despite this, there was one more song that came out this year that I liked more
than this. What could it be? Well, let’s move on and find out.
#1.
If any of you know
anything about the music of 1976, you’ve probably already guessed what this
next song is. And if someone you’re reading this list with hasn’t guessed it
yet, feel free to smack that person on the back of the head. I wasn’t kidding
when I said that there was a lot of good music this year and that all the good
music was amazingly good. I mean, the honorable mentions list should be
indication enough of that. However, when it all came down to it, there was only
one song that could possibly have made the number one spot for this list.
#1. Bohemian Rhapsody (Queen) [18; 9; 17
weeks]
I honestly really
struggled with the decision to put this song on the list. I will admit, prior
to putting this list together, I was kind of sick of this song. I’d heard it so
often, so frequently that it was really wearing out on me. And yet, when I sat
down to listen to the song for this list, after having gone without listening
to it for quite some time, I was amazed to find that it still held up. However,
that just raised the question of whether or not I should include it on the
list. I didn’t want to include the song on the list just because I kind of
liked it despite the over exposure or just because it’s a song people would be
expecting to see on the list. So, I went back and listened through it a couple
of times, and ultimately came to the decision to include it because it’s just
legitimately a great song.
Sadly, I feel like
I’m also significantly underprepared to analyze this song. I mean, hundreds of
other people have done so before me, and have likely made every interpretation
that could possibly be made about this song, I mean, what am I supposed to talk
about? I guess I could discuss how the song draws on contemporary rock
ideology, the individualism of the bohemian artists’ world and the ‘rhapsody’
in the title affirming the romantic ideals of art rock. Or I could talk about
how the song is a mock opera, divided into various sections, starting with a
closed five-part harmonized a capella intro before transitioning into a piano
ballad, then a guitar solo by Brian May, then a fast paced, operatic segment
that varies in dynamics and illustrates the narrator’s descent into Hell, then
the hard rock ‘bridge’ of the song, I guess you could call it, before finally
closing with a minute-long outro that brings the song full circle by returning
to the tempo and form of the intro. Or I could discuss how the song lyrically
describes a man questioning whether his life experiences were real or just
fantasy, revealing that he’s just killed a man and in doing so having thrown
his life away, showing serious regret for his actions before bidding the world
good-bye and expressing that he does not want to die, before falling into Hell
and making references to Scaramouche, the fandango, Galileo Galilei, Figaro and
Bismillah as various factions fight over his soul before concluding that
Beelzebub already has plans for what to do with him, then accusing an
unspecified second-person audience of betrayal and abuse, seeming to call back
to the events that may have led to his earlier described act of murder before
ultimately concluding by exclaiming ‘Nothing really matters to me, any way the
wind blows.’
I could talk in
further detail about all of these things, but unfortunately, I do not have the
patience, or the level of analytical experience to be able to pull that off
without retreading what others before me have already said. And even if I had
either of those things, I shouldn’t have to; this song is already universally
accepted as one of the greatest songs in music history, and it’s not hard to
see why! Not only does it demonstrate how a song doesn’t necessarily need to stick
to the conventional songwriting formula that we’ve seen done to death at this
point, but it is a shining demonstration of the idea that just because
something is popular doesn’t mean it automatically has to suck! This song is a
goddamn masterpiece, and I am glad that being able to put this list together
gave me the opportunity to examine it in greater detail and better appreciate
the separate parts that come together to create a magnificent whole!
‘Bohemian
Rhapsody’ by Queen: even if it’s not the greatest song of all time, it is most
definitely, without question, the absolute best hit song of 1976.
