Top 5 Best & Worst Run-D.M.C. Songs

Hello folks. This might be a surprise for some of you, but when I was growing up, I was not a huge fan of hip-hop or rap music. It was prevalent, yes, but I was mainly exposed to it during the mid-to-late 2000s, when I was in middle and high school. One particular song left an unpleasant stain upon the entire genre for me, and trust me, I will get to it some day. Fortunately, my time in college helped me gain a better appreciation for it, to the point that I became curious of older groups from the genre.

            Today we’ll be looking at one of the original rap groups: Run-D.M.C. This band is especially significant because they created most of the trends that became prevalent in rap music at the time, such as Adidas shoes without shoelaces, and performed the first rap song to reach the top 5 on Billboard, unless you count Blondie’s ‘Rapture’, which I don’t. Hip-hop had existed before Run-D.M.C., but their take on the genre shaped it into what it is today, for better and worse.

            As usual, we’ll be exploring both ends of the spectrum as we look into their discography and excavate their long-forgotten gems and the justly forgotten, fossilized turds. Keep in mind, just because I don’t like a song by this band, that’s no excuse for anyone reading this to not like the song either. It doesn’t mean I’m trying to smear the legacy of the band either; Run-D.M.C. has a legacy they should be proud of, and nothing I say could possibly change that.

            Now then, let’s begin by seeing how the band be illin’, by counting down…

…THE TOP 5 WORST RUN-D.M.C. SONGS!

            #5.

            If you are at all familiar with Run-D.M.C.’s discography, you’ve probably at least heard of their cover of Aerosmith’s ‘Walk This Way’, off of their third and probably most commercially successful album, ‘Raising Hell’. However, I’m going to be starting off with a different song off of that same album: ‘It’s Tricky’. It’s a song about how difficult it can be to come up with a good rhyme for a rap. Ultimately, while still a bit goofy, it’s not that terrible. Then, twenty-seven years after the song’s release, someone remixed it.

            #5. It’s Tricky (DJ Fresh Remix) (Single Release Only)

            Allow me to introduce you to DJ Fresh, an American hip-hop producer based in Oakland and Los Angeles. You’ve likely never heard of him and, had I not chosen to do this list, neither would I. He first started producing around 2006, and it shows.

            Looking back on the original, it had plenty of things to like about it. Jay’s production was spot-on as usual, and Run and D’s rhymes are solid. They admittedly do recycle a line or two from previous songs, but that’s hardly cause to call it bad by any means. Also, the sampling of the guitar stab from the Knack’s ‘My Sharona’ and the melody from Toni Basil’s ‘Mickey’ blended surprisingly well together.

            This train wreck of a remix nearly undoes all of this though. I found myself missing the Jam Master’s production almost immediately once the siren-like sound effects kicked in, making it sound like I was about to get run over by a cop car. Also, there were unnecessary changes to the lyrics that don’t add anything to the song, and somehow the chorus became a lot more annoying with the more modern production added on. By the way, no, the stuttered lyrics afterwards don’t help.

            I will admit that I’m not a huge fan of the original song, but I can at least understand the appeal. It’s ridiculous without being obnoxious about it, and it doesn’t try to act too serious about it, things that can definitely not be said of this remix. It takes all of the worst elements of the original song and multiplies them exponentially without bringing any positive changes to the table. It may be tricky to rock a rhyme that’s right on time, but it is dead simple to screw this song up, and DJ Fresh went the extra mile in that regard. I hope you’re proud of yourself, sir.

            #4.

            What’s worse than a song that sounds like a commercial? How about a song that literally is a commercial?

            #4. Penthouse Ad (Tougher Than Leather: Deluxe Edition)

            Like most people, I feel that Run-D.M.C.’s fourth album, ‘Tougher Than Leather’, is a criminally underrated album. It featured some of the group’s best work, and even the bad songs on the album weren’t that bad. Of course, I would probably recommend that you stick to the original version and skip the deluxe edition, and that’s entirely because of this one “song”.

            I understand that they needed to promote the magazine since they were featured in it. Celebrity appearances in commercials are just a regular thing, and one of the most influential groups in hip-hop music doing so doesn’t shock me in the least. What does bother me is that they tried to make an official song out of it. Even when most pop stars write songs that include brand names in them, they tended to limit it to a line or a small portion of the song, not shoving the company’s merchandise in the audience’s face and saying, “Buy this! Buy this!”

            Considering this was after a fairly successful period for both Run-D.M.C. and Penthouse Magazine, I’m assuming they did this to try and bolster each other’s popularity and make more money. Whether or not this worked I have no idea, since I can’t find anything about the group’s magazine interview anywhere. Even the lyric sites that expand upon song lyrics didn’t have anything to add regarding this song.

            I’m not saying artists shouldn’t try to promote themselves. Business is business after all, and artists still need to make money if they want to keep doing what they like. What bothers me is when they do so in a way that’s this transparent, to the point that the song even includes a radio announcer at the end. I’m not making that up; they seriously did that. Guys, there’s promoting yourselves, and then there’s making a desperate cash grab. I know you’re capable of better than this!

            #3.            

                       

            For the group’s final studio album, ‘Crown Royal’, there was a lot of tension between Run and D, with the two having different visions for the record. One wanted a more aggressive sound while the other wanted to get more introspective. Also, much like their previous record, this one featured multiple guest artists, though in much greater magnitude. Sadly, very few of the tracks make good use of their guest artists, to the point that some drag the whole thing down. For example…

            #3. Them Girls (ft. Fred Durst) (Crown Royal)

            Yes, this actually happened. Run-D.M.C., the first group to officially bring hip-hop to the mainstream, decided to collaborate with whiny man-child Fred Durst. How in the nine hells did they think this would end well!? This is the same man who, just three years prior, tarnished one of George Michael’s most famous songs of his career! This man is a walking musical disaster! Unless you’re deliberately trying to embarrass yourself and pray that people realize you’re doing it ironically, you don’t put this man on your song!

            To be fair, not everything about this song is the worst thing possible. The production is pretty solid. It’s certainly a nice departure from anything Limp Bizkit has ever done. The guitar line is energetic and bouncy, and the electronic bits surprisingly don’t clash completely with them. If I had just the instrumentation to go off of, I’d almost be willing to listen to this.

            Of course, what ruin the song are the lyrics and personalities of the performers. Large chunks of the song are taken up by repetitions of the phrase, “Them girls”, though it’s not like the verses are much better. First of all, both artists mentioned 2Pac, which…Seriously guys, too soon! Then there’s Fred’s line about organizing panties on the shelf, and if that doesn’t make your skin crawl, then maybe his comment about liking the small girls, the tall girls, and all the girls might. Also, what makes you think these girls’ boyfriends will be happy that their girlfriends are bringing home Limp Bizkit toys Fred?

Maybe Run-D.M.C. were just out of ideas and desperate to get the album out, maybe they were just trying to ride off Limp Bizkit’s coattails and regain some level of popularity, or maybe they just gave up and were trying to go for career suicide! Regardless, there is no justification for this! However, this wasn’t the worst collaboration the group would see from this album. For that, we have…

            #2.

            Why!?

            #2. The School of Old (ft. Kid Rock) (Crown Royal)

            This collaboration baffles me even more than the one with Fred Durst! While the man is reprehensible, and I am finding myself throwing up in my mouth at the realization that I’m about to defend him, at least he made his own material! Also, at the very least Limp Bizkit can make the claim that they were memorable and had a unique sound! What does Kid Rock bring to the table that couldn’t be brought by anyone else a million times better!?

            Remember how I said that, despite its flaws, the instrumentation to that last track was at least passable? Sadly, such was not the case with ‘The School of Old’, which sounds like a stampede of trucks, undoubtedly the ones owned by the kind of people that would listen to Kid Rock. There isn’t even a melody line in this song; it’s just loud, obnoxious noise clattered together in a mish mash of what vaguely sound like guitars and screaming.

            The lyrics don’t fair much better, unfortunately. They basically sway back and forth between tough guy posturing and empty brags about how awesome Run and Kid Rock are. Most of them aren’t even all that impressive either. Also, they just lifted the chorus from a verse from ‘Raising Hell’, only with Kid Rock rubbing his gross, sweaty ego all over it. D.M.C. doesn’t even feature on this song, as was the case with most songs off of ‘Crown Royal’, not that I blame him considering who got picked to collaborate with them.

            Like with ‘Them Girls’, the guest artist seriously drags things down, though it’s not like anyone else does anything to make up for it. The song sampled a few other Run-D.M.C. songs, but they’re practically unrecognizable here. Then again, I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that Kid Rock couldn’t be bothered to bring an ounce of original thought to this, considering his usual output. Despite all of this, however, there was still one song worse. Prepare yourselves folks…

            #1.            

            When I tried looking for this song online, I seriously struggled to find it. It feels like people went out of their way to forget that this song existed, and after having finally found and listened to it, I completely understand why. It is rare that you come across a song like this, a song by arguably one of the smarter mainstream hip-hop artists that demonstrates such little thought or effort that it almost feels like a parody gone horribly wrong. So folks, I present to you the absolute worst song that Run-D.M.C. has ever released:

            #1. P Upon a Tree (Back From Hell)

            I will never understand what was going through this group’s minds when they decided to write this. Say what you want about the collaborations with Fred Durst and Kid Rock; there was their…”popularity” at the time that might’ve passed as a flimsy excuse why Run-D.M.C. chose to work with them! Even ‘Penthouse Ad’ had some justification in that it was the group trying to make a quick buck! What possible excuse does this have to exist!?

            There’s no irony or sarcasm in this song; it’s about exactly what you think it’s about: one of the members of the group needs to pee, and the only option he currently has is to do so on a tree. Maybe this was originally used as an exercise to warm up their voices or something, but it’s not a solid enough idea for a complete song! By the way, nice fake Jamaican accent dude. Were you trying to hop on the reggae bandwagon or outdo UB40 in terms of making the worse reggae song?
             I don’t think I need to go into further detail at this point. It’s a stupid song with a careless premise that fails to present even the tiniest ounce of effort on the part of three artists who should’ve known better. Run, D, Jay, what in the names of the kings of Queens were you guys thinking!?

            Right then, now that that’s out of the way, let’s get down with the king as we count down…

…THE TOP 5 BEST RUN-D.M.C. SONGS!

            #5.

                       

            Where best to start than what was probably the group’s best album? I know it wasn’t as successful as ‘Raising Hell’, but ‘Tougher Than Leather’ is, in my opinion, the better track. More of the songs on this album saw Run-D.M.C. at their best. The few bits of experimentation they went with worked well, and they didn’t fall back on featured artists, and such output ultimately resulted in this song:

            #5. Mary, Mary (Tougher Than Leather)

            It can be interesting to see how some songs progress and evolve over time. This particular song was originally recorded by the Butterfield Blues Band in 1966, then covered by the Monkees in 1968, and finally, sampled by Run-D.M.C. in 1988. Granted, this kind of transition doesn’t always work out well; some covers tend to be better than others while some artists don’t use sampling well at all. Fortunately, Run-D.M.C. was a smarter hip-hop group than most, so their version came out impressively well.

            Firstly, there’s the production, handled courtesy of Def Jam Records co-founder Rick Rubin. The man’s done some impressive production work for the likes of the Beastie Boys, Slayer, the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, and even with more recent artists, such as Justin Timberlake, Adele, Lady Gaga, and Kanye West. I’m personally of the opinion that Run-D.M.C.’s music is at its best when it incorporates elements of rock, and while minimal on this song, those guitar licks sampled in there make all the difference. The record scratches are certainly gratuitous, and can be kind of grating at points, but they’re not as bad as I’ve seen from other bands.

            That brings us to Run-D.M.C. themselves. Their flow here is noticeably quicker than on most of their work, which I think works to the song’s strength. While fast rhymes aren’t always a strength, these ones give the duo a very lively pace and keep the song moving at an upbeat tempo, despite the song’s somewhat dark lyrics.

            While it can be shaky territory for an artist to try something different, I’d say this was a great success for the group. It wasn’t their best example of experimentation, though we’ll be getting to that later on. As is though, I’d say this was quite the opposite of contrary for Run-D.M.C.

           

            #4.            

            While I’m of the opinion that ‘Tougher Than Leather’ is the better album, that doesn’t mean I don’t understand why ‘Raising Hell’ was the group’s biggest success.

            #4. Raising Hell (Raising Hell)

            This was a perfect choice of song for the title of the album, because it summarizes its thesis fairly accurately. It existed for precisely one reason: to firmly establish, not just Run-D.M.C.’s superiority in the rap game, but that they were the ones who invented the game in the first place. There were other hip-hop and rap artists before them, but with ‘Raising Hell’, both the album and the song, they proudly proclaimed themselves the true kings of rap.

            For starters, while slower than the previous song, the tempo makes it easier to take in the lyrics, and boy do you need to. When you hear modern brag rap, you can tell that this is what it’s aspiring to be like, even if it doesn’t really get there. I’m not even a fan of this subgenre, but with some of the lines they use here, Run-D.M.C. proves that they’re the real deal.

Kings from Queens from Queens come Kings

We’re raisin hell like a class when the lunchbell rings

The king will be praised, and hell will be raised

Suckers try to faze him but D won’t be fazed

            These opening lines tell the listener right off the bat that the pair won’t stand down to the sucker MC’s because they stand as kings on high, raising hell as they see fit. They even cause havoc in hell by dissing the devils that inhabit it, to the point that their sound even reaches the heavens, sounding like thunder and flashing like lightning. Run and D are lords of lyrics and controllers of crowds. Those that hear their rhymes are their subjects, and those that oppose them are left with a firm kick in the behind.

            This might not have been the song that got people to buy the album, but goddamn if it didn’t spell out just how amazing the group was once they did. If they’d stopped recording music right after dropping this record, this song would’ve been an accurate summarization of their careers. Of course, that alone wouldn’t be enough now, would it?

            #3.

            What’s this, another title track? What are the odds?

            #3. Tougher Than Leather (Tougher Than Leather)

            Fresh off of establishing themselves as the kings of hip hop with their third album, Run-D.M.C.’s fourth helped them to experiment with different rapping styles and techniques. Fortunately, this didn’t come at the cost of their integrity like it did when they tried further experimentation on ‘Back From Hell’, their fifth album. However, rather than focusing on the disasters that were yet to come, let’s take a look at arguably the best track off of what was arguably their best record: ‘Tougher Than Leather’.

            Where ‘Raising Hell’s greatest strength was its lyrics, ‘Tougher Than Leather’s is probably its flow. Like other tracks on the album, the title track shows the group adding to their style with things like alliteration, polysyllabic rhyming, and internal rhyming. So, while this song is about the same tempo as the last song, the words flow into each other more smoothly, especially with the at least near rhymes utilized in almost every stanza of the song.

            As usual, the song also features the band utilizing hard rock guitar riffs with their hip-hop production. The guitar licks on this song not only keep the song moving, but also they keep it engaging too. They contrast nicely with the beat, which is intense in its own right, but not too intense. The guitar solo near the end also helps build things up for the final verse.

            This song is a perfect balance of all of Run-D.M.C.’s best elements at their peak: smooth flow, powerful lyrics, and hard rocking instrumentation. This is probably one of the last great songs the band would ever release, and it certainly would’ve been a great note for the band to end on. It’s hard rocking, defter than acrobatics, and most definitely tougher than leather.

            #2.

            I’ve spoken at length of Run-D.M.C.’s work during and after their first taste of mainstream success, but I don’t think we’ve had the opportunity to look at their work before their big breakthrough. Why don’t we change that?

            #2. You’re Blind (King of Rock)

            ‘King of Rock’, the band’s second studio album, was where they started incorporating a more rock-influenced sound into their music. It’s kind of interesting to me that a band considered one of the progenitors of old school hip-hop were mostly well known for making music that took inspiration from rock, but that isn’t a criticism. You certainly wouldn’t see the likes of Post Malone or Lil Uzi Vert effectively integrating rock sound into their songs.

            While the lyrics to most of the group’s early work tended to be limited to bragging, ‘You’re Blind’ sees them delving into social commentary, something hip-hop can be surprisingly effective at conveying, yet nowadays few people use it for that. In this case, it’s commenting on how the desperation of people can lead them to trying to live lives of crime and sin. Some would compete to see who was the most “fly” by acting like they’re more than they are or have more than they do, also known as fronting.

            Considering this was released in the ‘80s, a time of extreme greed, it seems fitting that a song discouraging people from spending their money on fake crap would be recorded in this decade. I say this as someone who proudly admits to being a dork and has spent his whole life avoiding superfluous things like “being fly”: this song hits a chord for me. Guys, maybe we shouldn’t waste our time and money on platform shoes and fake gold and focus on paying our rent.

            If you don’t like this song for being preachy, I won’t hold it against you. However, I will respectfully disagree with you, because this song is awesome. Of course, there was still one song in the band’s discography I thought was better. So, let’s wrap things up with…

            #1.

            I know I’ve said this before, but I don’t like being predictable when putting these lists together. I don’t go out of my way to be unpredictable when I decide which song will place on the list though; I need to keep it honest after all. That said it is somewhat frustrating when my #1 is something people are expecting. Then again, considering how awesome the song is, it’s not like I have the right to complain.

            #1. Walk This Way (ft. Joe Perry & Steven Tyler) (Raising Hell)

            Having now gone through all of this band’s discography, I’m now kicking myself for not including this song on the best of ’86 list. Consider it my unofficial choice for #11, I suppose. While certainly a flawed album, ‘Raising Hell’ had its shining moments, and this was, by far, the brightest of them all. I shouldn’t even need to explain why this song was #1 on this list, but for the sake of those unfamiliar, I’ll try my best to explain.

            For starters, this is a cover of an Aerosmith song from the ‘70s. The original isn’t a terrible song by any stretch, but it was missing something, some spark that the inclusion of Run-D.M.C. on the track was able to achieve. What was once a fairly laid-back rock song was now a high-energy rock-rap masterpiece. Their presence on the song elevates it greatly just with their flow and interplay.

            Of course, while Run-D.M.C. play their parts well on this revitalizing cover, Steven Tyler and Joe Perry of Aerosmith further raise the song with their segments. While Tyler’s vocals on the original weren’t bad, his rerecorded vocals here have a certain commanding presence. As for Perry, his guitar licks kick up the song’s flow and energy, blending well with the Jam Master’s production.

            Not only did this cement Run-D.M.C. as superstars, it also reinvigorated Aerosmith’s time in the spotlight, and officially introduced rap to the mainstream with the genre’s first top 5 success. I’m not sure what else there is for me to say at this point. This song is amazing, and easily the best song in Run-D.M.C.’s discography.